Things that keep me here-

My pets.  It breaks my heart and brings me to tears to think of how they would miss me.  It would be a terrible thing to leave them.  Above all, they have kept me here, they have been the one thing stopping me in my darkest hours.

I'm in love with everything.  I love the different shapes of trees and how they blow in the wind.  I love to smell things in the air.  I love the feeling of sunshine or rain on my skin.  I love grass and sand and carpet and cold floors.  I love soft things on my skin, fresh sheets, animals.  I love architecture and to think of how much humans have created, how far we've come.  I love art and I love fossils, dinosaurs.  I love to do childlike things and play with toys.  I love different variations of color.
I love the parts of life that I can enjoy from afar, the things that are just for me.
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These are what I hold tight to when I consider ending it all.  How much easier it would be to stop hurting and to stop hurting those around me.  How nice it would be to feel like a person, instead of a wild animal, instead of someone so angry inside.
These things.  Not my husband, not my family, just these small things.